Buying You Off

I’m gearing up to write my thoughts on feminism and since I’m certain I’ll probably and most-likely upset (not intentionally, of course) at least a couple readers I decided that I should hold off just a little bit longer.

Just long enough to give you a recipe for brownies.

My hope is that you make these brownies right away and then stash them in the freezer and when you see that I’ve posted about my thoughts on feminism, you will quickly run to the freezer, snatch a brownie and start gnawing on it before you read the post. Then, while you read through my long-winded pontifications (that’s redundant, right?) your brain will be thinking lots of how-dare-she-think-that and I-can’t-believe-she-said-that thoughts, but your mouth will be saying oh my word, these are so incredibly delicious, and so in the end everything will turn out just fine between us and you’ll still read my blog and I’ll still dare to speak my mind, though I will always throw you a sweet morsel beforehand. Promise.

You better make a double batch of these brownies. No, no, I’m not preparing to make multiple disconcerting speeches, just the one for now, but I’m saying you need to make two batches because the brownies freeze really well, and well, they taste really good.

I’ve tried many different recipes for brownies, trust you me. I even made the brownies out of Cooks Illustrated, and those people always tie themselves up in knots, trying to create the best of everything. Their brownies, were good, really good, in fact, but I still prefer to make these when the urge for a brownie hits me smack upside the head. I’m not sure why that is. Maybe because I grew up making them and so the recipe is a part of my life experience, just like being homeschooled when I was little, being an oldest child, and being born with a chicken breast (don’t ask). These brownies are, like, a part of my identity.

And they are really good. Did I say that yet?

Why are they good? I’m not too skilled at food writing, but I’ll give it a shot. Um, well, if you don’t bake them too long and burn the edges and dry them totally out, they get moist, chewy, and dense. They are not cake-like, nor are they fudge-like; they are chocolate-y-like. You can add nuts and chips and frosting, but these additions are adulterations of the one, true brownie. This is a pure brownie. It is virtuous and undefiled, virginal and chaste. It’s wily and winsome, but yet modest. You see it and you want it.

So how’s that for food prostitution?

These brownies stand up very well on their own (in other words, served all by their lonesomes), but I also like them with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, and some caramel sauce. Like, you know, every afternoon with my coffee, while they last.

Now go on—make yourself a stash. My feminist thoughts are just about ready to serve up (you haven’t sensed any vibes, have you?). I’ll dish them out soon enough. You best get prepared.


2 ounces unsweetened baking chocolate
7 tablespoons butter
1 cup sugar
2 eggs, beaten
½ cup flour
½ teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla

Melt the chocolate and butter in a heavy-bottomed saucepan on low heat, stirring occasionally, and once the chocolate and butter have melted, remove the pan from the heat.

In a separate bowl mix together the sugar and eggs. Add the egg mixture to the chocolate mixture and whisk well.

Add the flour, baking powder, and salt and stir to incorporate. Add the vanilla and stir a little more.

Pour the brownies into a greased, square (9 x 9) glass pan, and bake at 350 degrees for 22-27 minutes. The cake tester (or toothpick, in my case) should have little smears of chocolate on it when you check, but the brownies should be fairly firm to the touch.

Cut the brownies while still warm, but cool completely before transferring them to a plastic container (put wax paper in between the layers) and then to the freezer.


  • Jennifer Jo

    Dr. P, Uncle Gerry maybe?

    Aunt Val, You are so sweet! I love you, too!

    Mom, I won’t breathe a word. I often take less-than-the-best to potluck, too. Shh.

    Kris, You ARE sassy, so just embrace it. It’s a good thing.

    KTdid, It may take me a little to formulate the words for that post, so be patient. Eat a few brownies while you wait, okay?


  • Anonymous

    Here comes a terrible admission: I just went through a spell where my allegiance lay with Betty Crocker’s triple chunk supreme brownie mix. Can you-all believe!! But I’m recovering. Just today–I hadn’t yet seen JJ’s spiel–I took down the store package from my cupboard with the intent to dispense of it by baking the contents for this coming Sunday’s potluck at church. Potlucks are a good way to get rid of foods of questionable nature, is my theory (don’t tell anybody at Pinto, PLEASE).


  • Anonymous

    I’ll pass on the brownies. I can handle whatever you say because I already have a good idea what it will be.

    The “chicken breast” comes from the Hurst genes in you.

    I do love you JJ, my niece and 2nd cousin once removed.

    -Aunt V

  • Anonymous

    A CHICKEN BREAST?!! Sorry, everything else went out the window after you divulged that little tidbit…so I’ll make the brownies, I’ll listen to the views on feminism, I’ll keep on reading your super blog, but I’ll be waiting…


  • Anonymous

    I just reread my comment and realized how very sassy I sound. Or arrogant? Probably not everyone knows it, (which brownies are the best) I might have just made that up, but it could be true.


  • Anonymous

    Bring it on, sister. I can handle whatever you want to say, without the brownies. Yeah, you heard me: I’m not gonna make the brownies. I’ll just believe you. Anyway, everyone knows that brownies made with butter and unsweetened baking chocolate are the best ones. (Unless you need gluten-free, dairy-free brownies. In that case, I’ve got the best recipe. So there.)


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