• Black Boots and My Long-Necked Deficit

    I told you I would tell you about this bread, Chocolate-Sour Cherry, but I just haven’t gotten around to it till now.


    The truth is, I don’t like this recipe, and I feel guilty for not liking it. I mean, who in their right mind doesn’t like chocolate-sour cherry bread? I imagine that long-legged, long-necked, black-boot-wearing French women eat it all the time. Probably even for breakfast.

    Maybe I need to put on my black boots and try it again. It might taste different then.

    But I can’t fix the long-neck deficit.


    The other possibility is that I’m not making it right. But this last time I followed the recipe exactly. I used my own dried cherries and good chocolate. But still, I just don’t like it. It’s too dry. And I don’t like the sourdough-bread-turned-chocolate flavor.

    I guess I’m just not sophisticated enough.

    However, I know there are others out there who have longer necks than me, so I’ll take the time to type up the recipe for you. You’re welcome.

    Chocolate-Sour Cherry Bread
    Adapted from Breads from the La Brea Bakery by Nancy Silverton

    ½ cup (4 ounces) cool water
    2 teaspoons yeast
    2/3 cup (6 ounces) white starter
    5 ½ tablespoons (1 ounce) dark cocoa powder, unsweetened
    1/4 cup (2 ounces) sugar
    2 cups, plus 2 tablespoons, (10 ½ ounces) bread flour
    4 tablespoons (2 ounces) butter, cut into smaller pieces
    1 ½ teaspoons salt
    2/3 cup (3 ounces) dried sour cherries, unsweetened
    4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, cut into ½-inch chunks

    Put the first six ingredients (down through the flour) in the mixing bowl and mix for three minutes. While the mixer is still running, add the butter, a tablespoon at a time. After the butter has been incorporated, add the salt and mix for about nine more minutes. Add the cherries and chocolate and mix for just a couple minutes, until it is well blended.


    Transfer the dough to a clean, oiled bowl, cover with a shower cap let sit at room temperature for a couple hours. At that point, cut the dough into the desired sizes and shape into loaves (I made four mini-loaves, but you can also make two regular bread loaves, though they will be small). Cover with plastic and refrigerate overnight.

    The following morning, remove the loaves of bread from the refrigerator, take off the plastic wrap, and cover the loaves with a cloth. When the dough has reached a temperature of 64 degrees, dock the tops (I think I forgot to dock mine), and bake at 400 degrees for 30-40 minutes.

  • Christmas Gifts

    I like to give little gifts to our neighbors at Christmas time. Yes, it’s cliche. Yes, everybody else does it. Yes, I know I’m not original. But that’s okay. The Christmas season provides a window of opportunity to show people that I care for them. I like that—it’s a good thing, in my mind. Besides, I’m already in the over-do-it-in-the-kitchen mode, so just putting myself out a little further is not that much of a stretch.


    We don’t know many of our neighbors, at least not well. Many of them are elderly (I rely on the fact that they are probably hard of hearing—helps me to feel less guilty about all the screaming and hollering that emits from our living quarters), and the rest are mostly adults who have jobs and stay indoors when they are home. We kind of rule our neck of the woods.

    I know our neighbors are kind folk, deserving of a little plate of Christmas goodies. I know this, merely because they have not turned us in, yet. I’m hedging my bets that one little plate of orange-cranberry sweet rolls or some chocolate-covered toffee to buy us one more year of goodwill.

    I’m such a pragmatic person.

    This year I’m giving little loaves of Country-White sourdough bread. I have a bunch of the little loaves stashed in our freezer, destined for our neighbors’ gullets. (And then I went above and beyond my intended giving-plan and sent some little loaves with Mr. Handsome when he ran into town the other afternoon—those loaves went to our pastors and church elders and church secretary. No, I am not buying my way into heaven! I can’t believe you just thought that! Come on, people, it’s Christmas. Can’t a body just want to give a gift without their motives being scrutinized? Geez.)


    The way the plastic wrap stands up on top of the loaves, it makes them look like they just stuck their doughy fingers in a light socket and got electrocuted. It makes me feel rather quaint, giving electrocuted baked goods away as Christmas gifts.

  • But Then

    I am opposed to healthy desserts. I am averse to them. I loath them. I am aggressive in my defiance towards them (thank you, Word Perfect Prompt-As-You-Go). Reduced-fat cream cheese? No way. Whole wheat cookies? Blech. Applesauce in place of oil, or yogurt in place of sour cream? I don’t think so.

    Desserts are supposed to be rich and sweet, made from the best of butters and sugars and chocolates and creams. I would much rather eat a small piece of deliciously calorie-laden cheesecake any day, instead of a medium-sized piece of pallid reduced-fat, reduced-sugar cheesecake. (Of course, the “small” piece of cheesecake is for theoretical purposes only.)

    But then I ate these walnut balls, and I’m having to eat my words, along with them.


    These cookies are rich, decadent, and divinely delicious, but they are also, I still can hardly believe this, healthy. As in, their base consists of ground-up walnuts. And there is some whole wheat flour in them. And flax meal.

    Flax meal in cookies? I know! I felt the same way! I could handle the nuts alright, but the whole wheat flour was pushing it, and then to add flax? Good heavens, I thought, Someone has surely gone over the deep end! But, this recipe works. It not only works, it also jives and jitters and does the two-step Mombo-Bombo. (I made that up.)

    And I have yet to even mention the clincher: there is no refined sugar. Instead, the recipe calls for maple syrup. (And dark chocolate chips, but they do not, I repeat, do not, count as a refined sugar.)


    I can not believe how much I love these cookies. If I had to pick just one of the many cookies that are crammed into my freezer to eat, right now, I would choose the walnut balls. The texture is superb—chewy, dense, tender. And the flavor is deep: dark and nutty, with a just a touch of bitter. And then there is the chocolate.

    Now, I will admit that the final cookie looked a little too healthy to suit me. They had a bit of a grayish hue to them, making them look dull and unappetizing (devious little things), but I, brilliant cook that I am, remedied that problem by rolling the little sweets in a some powdered sugar. Then they just looked white and sweet … and totally plain.

    Like I said, devious little buggers.


    I am no longer opposed to healthy desserts—it’s just not possible, after eating these walnut balls. Therefore, I now believe that healthy desserts are fine, as long as they are made from pure ingredients, and as long as the end result is both rich and decadent.

    Walnut Balls
    Recipe gifted to me, via cell phone, by my girlfriend Linell

    2 ½ cups English walnuts
    2/3 cup whole wheat flour
    1/3 cup flax meal
    ½ cup, plus a little drizzle more, maple syrup
    1 teaspoons salt, scant
    2 teaspoons vanilla
    1/3 cup chocolate chips (I used mini chips)
    Powdered sugar, for rolling

    Grind the walnuts to a fine powder in a food processor. Dump the ground nuts into a bowl and add the flour, flax, and salt. Stir well. Add the vanilla and maple syrup and mix until combined. Stir in the chocolate chips. Shape the cookies into small balls, the size of a large gum ball, and line them up on a cookie sheet. They do not change shape while baking, so you’ll probably be able to fit them all on one cookie sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 12-15 minutes, until the bottoms are golden brown and the tops are tinged with brown.

    While the cookies are still warm, roll them in powdered sugar, and then roll them in powdered sugar once more before serving.

    These cookies freeze well, but will need to be rolled in powdered sugar again before serving (they get all blotchy and mottled in the freezer), so only roll them in sugar once before freezing—save the second rolling for when you get them out to eat. Otherwise, you will be rolling them three times, and that would totally defeat the Healthy Cookie Effect.

    Yield: not enough.