my Exceptionally Talented Therapist Friend:
1. What everyone needs is to be delighted in.
2. Each of your children has a specific emotional need that only you can meet. Remember, each child connects differently with each parent. Figure out what that emotional connecting point is for each of your children, and then refer back to it often—it will help you cut through all the extemporaneous crap and get to the core of what they really need.
I’m still mulling over those gems, and I think I will be for a very long time.
8 Comments
Lisa Zahn
Yes, I get to hang out with Marna!!! But just once in a while as she and Erik live two hours away from us. We meet at her parent’s house, though, just an hour from our home.
I’m happy she gave me your blog link. I like what I’ve read!
Jennifer Jo
Sarah,
Thanks so much for visiting (the blog AND my home)—I would be thrilled if you guys ended up moving to the area.
Do you want to know what those two kids were doing upstairs? I later learned that they had tied a rope to Miss Becca Boo’s bedframe and were going to try to climb out of her bedroom window. They chickened out (thank goodness!) but then tried to climb up from the ground, but didn’t make it too far. All while we were visiting…
-JJ
Sarah
Hi Mama JJ,
LOVE your blog! Oh my goodness! You are a gardening/cooking/baking maniac – I love it! I will now be checking your blog everyday and will have to try some of your recipes..we didn’t get to talk about this the other day when I stopped by with Mom and Levi, but right before the holidays, I got really serious and busy with changing our eating habits (I could learn *A LOT* from you). Too bad we’ve blown it all with holiday eating..yuck! We’ll get back on track next week. Anyhow, it was SO good to see you and your kiddos the other day (at least two of them, since the other two were flying in and out of the house and crashing things upstairs.. Did I mention that I love the way you guys live life?) Wish we lived closer to you! 🙂
Jennifer Jo
LisaZ,
Hey! No fair! You get to hang out with Marna??? Lucky you!
Thanks for stopping by, and for your kind words.
-JJ
Jennifer Jo
40winkzzz,
Yes, I’m familiar with the love languages, but I think I mentioned them to my friend when I was trying to understand what she was saying, and she said that what she was getting at was something different. Though I’m still not sure what. Because I think the love languages would maybe answer the question. But maybe not. Is there something deeper we ought to be fishing for?
-JJ
Lisa Zahn
Hi Mama JJ! We have a mutual friend, Marna, and she gave me your blog link. Your blog is wonderful. I especially love the post before this one on homeschooling. Great thoughts!
I’ll keep stopping by…Lisa in Minnesota
40winkzzz
I was mulling over this, too, after reading it last night. And at some point over the course of my mulling, it occured to me that the "emotional connecting point" that your therapist friend mentioned is probably the same thing that others have referred to as the "love language". (I assume you are at least somewhat aquainted with those books or at least with the concept.) That was helpful to me, as it gave me a point of reference with which I am already familiar.
I was thinking about these things today as I was contemplating establishing some new habits for a new year. (I'm not much for resolutions.) Fuzz' "emotional connecting point" or "love langauage" I already know and I just need to be deliberate about meeting it. Spaz' & Cheez' I need to figure out. (Sometimes it changes as they get older.) Thanks for the prod!
Kate
Wise therapist friend.
Kate